Welcome to Futility!

Hello and welcome to Exercises in Futility! This blog is an evolutionary spur from my first blog, Land of the Midnight Baking. I’m continuing both blogs, but while Midnight Baking stays in the food realm, Exercises in Futility will consist of essays and reviews.

As I wrote posts for Midnight Baking, I found that I had stuff to say about more than just food. Now I have a place to put all of those words about non-food-related topics. I really don’t know what this blog will be, so I guess we will all just have to wait and see.

I’m awash in wedding planning at the moment. Up to my ears in price charts, all-inclusive packages, and lace. It’s kind of overwhelming.

How can I justify spending upwards of $8,000 for one evening? How can I spend anything like $600 on a dress that I will only wear once? How can I pay more that I would spend on a year’s worth of rent on a venue I can only use for 6 hours? How can I spend 2 weeks’ worth of grocery money on a single cake? Or a year’s worth of grocery money on a single meal?

I really don’t know. It’s difficult for me to spend $9.99 on a book from Kindle. I’m having a hard time with wedding planning, but likely not for the same reason many brides do. Weddings seem so wasteful to me. It goes against everything I’ve ever been taught to even consider having one.

Yet, I still want one. Ever since I started looking at wedding stuff, I’ve wondered what my centerpieces would look like, what my photos would look like, what flowers would be in my bouquet, how many bridesmaids I would have and what kinds of dresses they would wear. I can’t deny my entirely selfish curiosity to find out what a wedding would look like if I planned it.

Often, it makes me horribly guilty with privilege to know that I can afford to create something like this–even for a wedding of 100 people, it’s going to cost a pretty penny. I really don’t know if I can take pleasure any part of the wedding planning process because the cost bothers me so much.

If I can stop to enjoy the process more, it may actually begin to seem worth the trouble, but at the moment I’m not convinced that this whole wedding thing will be an experience I look back on with fond memories of time–and apparently most importantly, money–well spent.